Tag Archives: hearts

Lame Adventure 277: Funny Valentines

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching.  It’s a day I find reliably disappointing for once again I’m Special Someone-less.  When I last checked my inner melancholy-o-meter, with 1 being “good riddance” and 10 being “suicidally depressed”, I’m somewhere in the middle.  I will admit that I’ve lost all motivation to shave so under my clothes I resemble Chewbacca a little more every day.  I miss those Backrubs on Demand and I wish she had returned the book she borrowed, Middlesex, by Jeffrey Eugenides, among a few other reasons why I regret fighting like cats and cats.

Overall, in my 369 ¼ dog years, I can recall experiencing few romantic Valentine’s Days, but in that same time period, I have been bombarded with countless reminders of what I should do to celebrate this day with the Special Someone that usually eludes me every February 14th.  See examples below.

Say it with a classy card*.

*Card available from Noble Works.

Say it with flowers* provided no one is deathly allergic like me.

*The say it with flowers site.

Say it with a Jacques Torres* chocolate puzzle heart.

*How to get a chocolate puzzle heart.

Say it with Salmon Provençal and a Chicken Leg*.

*Maybe not.

I asked my buddy, Coco, a certified vixen of the heterosexual persuasion, to share any of her tales of man-woman Valentine’s Day joy.  Allow me to hand the keyboard to my pal.

Coco: VD.  Valentine’s Day is a Hallmark holiday.  Venereal Disease is a gynecologist’s holiday.

Thank you for that insight Coco.  Embedded below is a video Coco shot while hanging halfway out her narrow bathroom window of my sidekick, Greg, standing on her fire escape playing , My Funny Valentine, on his saxophone.  Enjoy and here in Lame Adventure-land we hope you share our gift of music along with candy, flowers and of course, that crowd-pleaser, Salmon Provençal and Chicken Legs, with your Special Someone.

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