Tag Archives: ashton kutcher

Lame Adventure 251: So Wrong It Can’t Be Real … Can It?

Many of my Lame Adventures have been pre-planned such as events I pay to attend with a member of my posse or events I determine I must check out on my own.  Other LA’s are spontaneous such as interesting sightings I discover on the street, mundane sightings I find interesting, and my favorite, serendipitous sightings.  Occasionally, I get elaborate — last August 24’s Stranger’s Day stunt and humiliating follow-up (Lame Adventures 221 and 222).  Recently a new first occurred, a Lame Adventure that just happened with almost a zero degree of effort from me.  It truly required minimal exertion.  I was in my sanctum sanctorum parked like a lump at my computer considering if I wanted to read about Demi Moore’s breakup with Ashton Kutcher until I remembered:

Me: I don’t give a rat’s ass about Demi Moore or Ashton Kutcher.

Instead, I proceeded to log onto Craigslist, click the Writing Gigs link, do a short scroll, and there it was — ding, ding, ding — the basis for this post.  Click the image below and check it out.

Real or fake? You tell me.

My first thought:

Me (thinking):  Huh?  What’s an APT?  Whatever happened to the lost art of simply spelling out what it is you mean?

My second thought:

Me (getting it):  What’s this got to do with writing?

A moment later it occurred to me that I should probably feel outrage:

Me (pondering):  Hm. [Insert a five-count pause to muster outrage.] What a pervert, douchebag, scumball, creep attempting to live out his chauvinistic  fantasy to degrade women — and with the gaul to do so in the Writing Gigs forum!

Next, I wondered:

Me (wondering):  Manhattan apartments aren’t cheap.  Is this offer open to women over forty that have only gone partially to seed?

Finally, while puffing hard on my Sherlock Holmes pipe, and following a prolonged coughing fit, I had a daylight moment:

Me (with light bulb shining above head): This is probably a prank!

Does anyone out there in Lame Adventureland have an opinion?  That post has been removed from CL.  Clearly, they had quite an opinion.