Before returning to regularly scheduled Lame Adventuring where I am making a spectacle of myself that excludes book plugging, I have noticed a significant hike in my book’s ranking in recent days. On Sunday, my ranking on Amazon’s Best Seller list had sunk to a number that exceeded 700,000. When I last looked at my ranking today, it had [insert loud dry hacking cough sound effect here] soared to # 83,181.
I attribute this rise to my devoted following of eleven (up from seven, but I suspect that two are spam bots), shout outs from several kind souls on the blogosphere and some of my nine followers on Facebook, The Bloggess’s endorsement, and maybe even an actual anonymous reader or two recommending my words of wackiness. Thank you one and all.
This improved ranking does not mean that my humble book has crashed Amazon’s web site. I am not that foolish to think such an absurd thought. My rank will probably sink back into the hundred thousandths, maybe into the millions within the next twenty minutes. At this learned stage in life, I am a realist. My thoughts tend to go in a more practical direction. For example, when I see a puddle on the subway platform, I consider if it’s from rain, spilled Mountain Dew, a fellow strap hanger’s urine or a possible combination of all three. When you’ve reached the age that I have, the age where if I were a dog, I could easily be dead three times naturally, and once prematurely, my patterns of thinking have no choice but to evolve. In fact, I wonder if there are people out there that are paid to think these types of thoughts. If there are, are they paid better than me and if so, is that job open and how can I apply?
Returning to topic, it was enlightening to learn that there are now two items available on Amazon that visitors considering buying my book are looking at.
One is a well-received humor manual written by Bunmi Laditan that was published in May by Scribners: The Honest Toddler: A Child’s Guide to Parenting. The other is dual purpose, a gadget with elusive charm as well as being quite a conversation piece amongst hunters, gatherers and very likely, copious imbibers: the Deer Rear with Bottle Opener.
When I first set out to write my book, I never imagined that I might have a shot at cornering the market with parents as well as those with an appreciation of deer anus bottle openers. Life is so unpredictable.