The other morning at The Grind, I was passionately bellowing to my colleagues, my sidekick, Greg, and (not) Under Ling (anymore):
Me: Never trust a woman that can pee standing up!
Although I now completely draw a blank about what we were discussing that I was so vehemently compelled to deliver that particular declaration at the top of my lungs, I clearly recall that at that very moment of me babbling, our boss, Elsbeth, entered. I was instantly motivated to hit my mute button and change the subject to floor and wall tile, my specialty in her employ.
Before my Lord and Master’s presence pulled the plug on the lively conversation with the Gang of Two (note: our beloved colleagues, The Quiet Man, moved on last fall, and my buddy, Ling, received her Get Out of Jail Free card last Friday), (not) Under Ling (anymore) casually mentioned that she had read in the New York Daily News that tourists rank New York as the Number One city in rudeness.
This detonated Greg and I. We trampled each other coming to Gotham City’s defense. I concur with Greg’s blanket assessment:
Greg: New Yorkers aren’t rude! They’re aggressive!
And sometimes, first thing in the morning, just too damn loud.